myHealth Story Archives - Page 2 of 2 - myHealth Clinic for Teens and Adults

Jun 07

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Happy Pride

By myHealth | Blog, myHealth Story | No Comments

Happy Pride! Check out what Lane, one of our awesome Youth Advisory Board (YAB) members, has to say about Pride and what it means to them.

June, or “Pride Month”, is a time for celebration. It’s a time to recognize all people of all genders and sexualities across the country and across the world. It is a time to remember those who fought for our rights and made it possible to have the freedom we do now. It is also a time to see how much progress we still have to make. For all the LGBTQIA+ people across the globe, it’s mainly a time for us to be loud and proud of who we are.

It’s not always safe for LGBTQIA+ kids to be open in public places, so the festival gives them a chance to feel secure and unguarded about themselves. The month’s festivities and bright colors give a bold identity to a proud community that has prospered even in the face of adversity.

This, to me, means that I can be strong and bold, regardless of what people think of me at school, in my family, or even what random strangers may think of me. It gives me the courage to be myself and provides a community of support for other people like me. I was raised in a Catholic family, went to Catholic schools my whole life, and never knew many LGBTQIA+ people until I was older. I felt like I was all alone, but after my first pride month, I gained friends who really knew and understood me. They made me realize that I wasn’t alone, and that being myself was okay. The most freeing lesson I’ve learned is how to be genuinely me. One thing I wish everyone knew is how to support young LGBTQIA+ people, especially adults. It’s hard for young kids to ask adults for the things they need, especially when the driving force behind the needs is something as personal as their identity. There are a few simple things adults can do to help young LGBTQIA+ kids feel more comfortable expressing themselves.

Introduce yourself with your pronouns. Walking up to someone and being upfront about your own identity will help them be more comfortable talking about theirs. For example, when I introduce myself, I make sure to say, “I use he/him/his or they/them/their pronouns.”
Do research on gender-neutral pronouns that you haven’t heard about before. There are pronouns used less commonly like ze/zir and ey/em that many non-binary people use. Knowing how to use these comfortably helps people feel accepted.
Use gender-neutral terms in conversation. Rather than saying “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”, use terms like “partner” or “significant other”. This can work for siblings, parents, and spouses as well.
Celebrate pride month with us! Even if you aren’t LGBTQIA+, showing your support for the community can go a long way. Grab that rainbow flag and wave it along with us! Help young kids and LGBTQIA+ teenagers and adults to be loud and proud by being accepting and proud of yourself. Whatever is going on in the world around you or in your community, choose love.

Nov 20

20

You are loved, because you are you.

By myHealth | Blog, myHealth Story | No Comments

This is an opinion piece and does not reflect the views of myHealth as an organization.

There seems to be this idea that faith, spirituality, and/or a relationship with [whomever you call] God or a higher power cannot and should not coincide with a healthy sexuality. Each person deserves to have spirituality if they wish; you are amazing and loved because you are you. It is possible to have faith and be a part of or be an ally to the LGBTQ community. Faith and spirituality looks different to everyone, to me, it is God. I did not grow up in church, I never understood what it meant to have a relationship with Him; I didn’t grow up with open communication where I felt comfortable asking questions, especially when it came to sexuality. My journey with faith and sexuality began as an adult.

I often feel as though I live in two different worlds. In one world I have a strong and supportive relationship with God and the community surrounding that. In my other world, I am a health educator, teaching young people to have confidence in themselves, to overcome the shame and fear that has been taught to them around sex and sexuality, and how to safely incorporate their personal values into romantic relationships. When I came up with the idea to write this article, I felt as though I belonged in both of these worlds. I have heard, listened to, and watched young people struggle, and believe that they cannot be loved because they are lesbian, gay, transgender, bisexual, intersex, or identify differently than society expects.

I couldn’t shake the feeling that there needs to be more clarity and openness when it comes to these two topics, which is why I am writing this article. I started writing several months ago, but was derailed after my research began and I read negative articles, opinions, and hateful blogs damning anyone who isn’t heterosexual to hell. Don’t get me wrong, there are others in cyberspace who know and believe that God loves them regardless of their gender, biological sex, sexual orientation, etc. The ones brave enough to write about it and show their belief and support have been ridiculed and bullied. Many of them chose to discontinue their writing because their emotional and mental health was suffering as a result. At the time I started my initial research and writing, I had been attending a small group every Thursday, attending church every weekend. I also loved my job, but I had a lot of questions regarding faith. How could God create a world where He only loved people who were heterosexual? A world where it’s okay to “love thy neighbor” as long as they look the same? If everyone had the choice to be born without pain, bullying, and difficulties, I believe that most would choose that path. People do not choose their gender, identity or sexuality, especially if it means they will have more obstacles or could experience hate, oppression, and/or fewer rights.

I am not going to pull out quotes from the bible to support my argument, because I do not believe that having faith is about having the resources to back it up. It is personal, and something that only that individual can understand. I will not be using the bible as a reference, because in the past, the bible served as a way to refute people of color’s rights as well as women’s rights. I believe God created this amount of diversity as a test of faith to overcome our differences, and find His compassion to love. I want you to know, I am a heterosexual, cisgender, white, female. Does that change your lens? I challenge you to read through this again. I am not biased, making up my own rules so that I “fit”, but I am also not condemning others for having differing beliefs, I listen and trust my faith. I am not perfect, but I love you for you, because that is what God teaches. If you or someone you know is looking for a place of worship that is welcoming and affirming of LGBTQ identified folks, click this link: https://www.outfront.org/resources/worship.

Laura, myHealth Health Educator

Jul 21

1

Purposeful Parenting

By myHealth | Blog, myHealth Story | No Comments

I feel like my time is running out. My kids are teenagers, thinking about college. The thought sends my stomach into a knot and brings tears to my eyes. It does not seem possible that the last 17 years have passed so quickly.

I have received lots of parenting advice. Pick your battles. Bribery works. Cuddle. Teach them to make good choices. Be there for them. Let them experience disappointment. Prepare them to manage money and their time and homework. Teach them manners. Show them respect, but ensure that it is reciprocated. Make sure they eat vegetables. Teach them to be kind. Don’t baby them. Make them strong. So many words from so many who have done this before me.

If only someone had told me how much my heart would break every time my child experienced disappointment. How my eyes would well with tears each first day of school as they walk towards the school doors, their backs to me. How proud I would be when they were proud. How this normally non-competitive, rational woman would turn into a snarling lioness when some unfairness toward her offspring was encountered. If only I had known how much love I would have for these two beautiful creations.

I have given up a lot for my children. Money, sure. They are very expensive. The man-child eats as if he may never get another meal. My personal interests have gone by the wayside. Although I enjoy it, I have not picked up a golf club in six years. I cannot remember the last time I read a book for an hour without interruption. I have spent eons of time putting together, sorting, breaking apart and searching for Legos. I have watched more Pixar and superhero movies than a normal adult should admit to. I have played games on the Wii, Xbox and Play Station until my thumbs hurt. I have colored with crayons, with colored pencils and with ink pens. I have been crafty, creative, and enthusiastic for every single school project, even when it is unexpectedly due tomorrow. I have watched episode after episode of silly Disney channel shows that bore me to tears.

And I would do it all again. Because that is what happens when you become a parent. A part of you is lost, for a while, as you focus on creating an adult. Time is lost doing things you need to do, not what you want to do. Parenting is an act of kindness. Of selflessness. Parenting is about being an example and a teacher. Parenting is about being militant and forceful. Of talking about difficult topics, and not shying away when they ask a personal question you’d likely prefer not to answer. Parenting is about being honest about yourself and being honest with them. Parenting is a 24/7 job. A job I wouldn’t trade for anything.

–

Gerilyn, Executive Director

May 16

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Teen Pregnancy Prevention & Awareness

By myHealth | Blog, myHealth Story | No Comments

It is May. All I see on Facebook is picture after picture of my friends’ kids dressed up in fancy clothes for prom. The girls look beautiful, alive and in some cases quite alluring. The young men look more mature than I have ever seen, a bit cocky even, wearing their suits, ties and tuxedos. The kids don’t look like kids. They look like young adults. And now that I’ve thought about that, I’m focused more on what’s going to happen on prom night than on what they are wearing and how happy they look.

Not too long ago, I had a conversation with my 15-year-old son about condoms. He has been to the clinic where I work and he knows that there is a bowl full of free condoms in the lobby. As we were driving home from school one day he said casually, ‘Can you only get condoms at the clinic?’ I snorted a giggle and said, ‘Of course not. You can get them anywhere.’ Seriously, how did he not know this? His response, ‘You’re lying. You can’t just get them anywhere.’ Well, he was right about that. They aren’t available anywhere. But nearly. I explained that you can get them at a CVS, Walgreens, pretty much any pharmacy, gas station, convenience store and of course at Target and the grocery store. ‘Target?’ he says. ‘You must be kidding.’

Shortly after this conversation, now with both my teen daughter and son in tow, we were in Target picking up a few staples for the household. Without really saying much about it, I marched towards the feminine hygiene aisle, right down to the end of the aisle where there is a very large and elaborate selection of condoms, dental dams and other products capable of providing safer sex. I just stopped and pointed. ‘See, they have condoms at Target.’ And then the three of us just stood in front of the display and stared. For several minutes. Certainly, the selection is much greater at Target than at the clinic. Who knew there were so many choices, colors, scents and even flavors? Well, now both my teenage kids know.

Prom night is special not only because they are often quickly graduating from high school. In some cases, prom night is the night these kids have decided to lose their virginity. The event is depicted, often with great humor, in many movies and TV shows. However, many young people are not fully prepared, or equipped, to have safe sex on prom night. As a parent, you can help your soon to be adults into making responsible choices by giving them access to and the knowledge about where to buy condoms. It is not that hard. It is not that scary. Just take the lead and walk them through the aisle at Target.

In the clinic, May is often a month where we see a few extra unplanned, positive pregnancies. To all the parents reading this: whether you have a tween, a teen or a young adult at home, please make sure they know where to buy condoms. It just makes sense.

Mar 10

1

Role Models

By myHealth | Blog, myHealth Story

It is difficult to imagine how my life would be altered had the people in it not been there, how it would be affected had other individuals been inserted. The advice I seek out, the opinions offered, and the support given continually adds indescribable value to my life. My father was my first mentor and role model. He believed in me, loved me unconditionally, and supported my decisions. He allows me to make mistakes and fail, a crucial part of growing and learning. He continues to be my sounding board and cheerleader. The amount of love I feel and experience is overwhelming.

As a professional, I connected with coworkers and supervisors who have guided and supported me; one of which is our executive director, Gerilyn. She is one of the strongest women I know. She gave me courage to leave a job that was breaking me down emotionally, and supports me as I grow with my role as a health educator at myHealth. I would not be at this organization or in this position had it not been for her, and I am so grateful. I have an abundance of strong women in my life who mentor me. I have had serious conversations, laughed, and cried with these women. They have encouraged me to take jobs, or not take jobs; they have reminded me of my value and inner beauty, and most importantly, they have challenged me.

It is not possible for us to know exactly what we are doing, how do we learn if we have never done it? Mentors can share their experiences and failures to help us thrive and avoid making the same mistakes.

http://www.mentorset.org.uk/what-is-mentoring.html

What is mentoring?

“Mentoring is to support and encourage people to manage their own learning in order that they may maximize their potential, develop their skills, improve their performance and become the person they want to be.” Eric Parsloe, The Oxford School of Coaching & Mentoring

More resources about mentoring:

http://www.forbes.com/sites/stevenberglas/2012/02/02/seven-reasons-most-people-need-a-mentor/#792ab72456f8

http://www.healthguidance.org/entry/13288/1/The-Importance-of-Role-Models.html

http://www.rootsofaction.com/role-models-youth-strategies-success/